


Sandcastles

by the general (fightingdoodles)



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Also Rey and Kylo are cousins, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Humor, Basically a college AU where Hux doesn't know how to function emotionally because he's Hux, Gen, Honestly I'm writing this as i go so if I need to i'll tag more stuff, Hurt/Comfort, I guess???? I don't really know what genre this is, M/M, Past Abuse, Past Domestic Violence, also the mentions of past abuse are really minor, but i'm tagging them anyways just so ya'll are aware
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-23
Updated: 2016-01-24
Packaged: 2018-05-15 16:08:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5792047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fightingdoodles/pseuds/the%20general
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The analytical part of Hux’s brain automatically calculates that if the man still has his coat on, it probably means that he hasn’t been sitting there for very long. The logical part of Hux’s brain doesn’t really care, and doesn’t really find this information useful. An even smaller, slightly irrational section of his brain finds the man mildly handsome. </p><p>The reasonable part of Hux’s brain angrily stomps that thought out.</p><p>-</p><p>College!AU where Hux and Kylo are both shit at emotional connections, but their friends think they need to get together anyways.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Basically a college AU that I just really wanted to write for no particular reason except that Hux is a fascinating character study and here's an excuse to write a lot about my favorite ginger space murderer in a setting where he's not actually completely awful.;; Sorry if this is trash, it's not beta'd or anything. :-( Also, Phasma's first name is literally just me using Gwendoline Christie's last name because she's amazing and I didn't have any better ideas.

Brendol Hux, Jr. was never any good at making friends. Even in elementary school, he recalls being a loner—he skipped two grades, third and fourth, and after that no one really wanted to associate with the fifth grader who was too small to be a fifth grader and too smart for his own good. He remembers having one friend, back in first grade, maybe—a girl with brown hair, fierce eyes, and mud-stained knees who would come over to the swing set and insist on getting to know him day after day, until they finally were inseparable, mostly because the girl followed him everywhere. But Hux knows that’s not completely true. After a while it was he who would find her playing in the sandbox during recess and plop down next to her. He remembers having sandcastle wars, his army of pebbles against her army of sticks and wood-chips. He doesn’t remember who won, but he remembers always looking forward to recess each day so that they could continue their magical sand-world battles. 

Her name was Rey. Hux doesn’t remember her last name.

He remembers hanging out with Rey the summer between first and second grade, too. She didn’t have a mother, only a father, who wasn’t very talkative but always gave him cookies when he came over to play. Hux liked her father, he recalls. The man was tall but not intimidating, and always smiling. He would greet Hux with a hug and always ask how he was doing. 

Hux remembers one time telling the man that he wished he was his real dad. He doesn’t remember what the man said in reply, but he thinks he recalls him giving Hux a sad smile and patting his shoulder fondly.

Hux and his friend would play in the woods behind her house, making up more fantasy worlds and battles. They never agreed on how the made-up kingdoms should be run, but having pretend battles against each other’s kingdoms had been more fun, anyway.

They were friends until halfway through second grade, when she and her dad moved away very suddenly. He remembers Rey saying goodbye, briefly. She had stopped by his house and rang his doorbell, even though they never played at Hux’s house, ever. Her dad had been with her. Hux hadn’t really understood what was going on at the time, but afterward he never saw her again.

The rest of second grade had been boring, uneventful. Hux still played in the sandbox by himself, but it wasn’t much fun without her.

Then he skipped third and fourth grade and soon learned that fifth graders were too old to play in sandboxes anyway, and that make-believe was stupid.

 

-

 

Hux meets Christie Phasma during his third semester of college (first semester of sophomore year), and they aren’t quite friends, not really. Hux hasn’t had a friend since elementary school, and he’s not about to start now. But, as far as he can tell, Phasma doesn’t seem to believe in making friends either, which is oddly comforting. They hang out more often than not, mostly because they are both too smart and a little younger than everyone else. Phasma had skipped eighth grade. He doesn’t ask why. They call each other by last name.

Phasma is tall and intimidating, with makeup that changes every day but is always sharp and dark. Her hair is short, bleach-blonde, always gelled away from her face. She wears shades of lipstick anywhere from pure black to shimmery lavender. Her eyeliner is always perfectly-winged. 

One time, Hux had tried on his mom’s makeup for fun, when he was nine or ten or something like that. It had been really hard to get the lines straight, so he is mildly impressed by Phasma’s skills.

He’d only done it once though, because when his mom found him trying her lipstick she’d snatched it away from him and snapped about it not being proper behavior. She’d looked more scared than mad, though, and while Hux at the time hadn’t understood why, present-day Hux knows that she’d been scared for him. _What if your father sees?_ She’d muttered angrily, half to herself, as she’d put back all the makeup in her bag and stuffed it under the sink, before grabbing some make-up wipes to scrub furiously at the mascara on his face.

Hux is glad that his father never knew about that incident. His mother never mentioned it again. How thoughtful of her.

Phasma reminds him vaguely of Rey, although that’s probably only because she’s the closest thing to a friend he’s had since his elementary school days. She’s fierce though, and confident. She’s also funny and lively in a way that Hux isn’t, but he doesn’t mind. Sometimes Hux thinks that she and Rey would have been friends, had they known each other. It’s a silly idea, really, and he doesn’t like the follow-up voice in his head that tells him that they’d probably be better friends with each other than him.

But Phasma’s not really his friend, so it doesn’t matter. They’re both too mean, too impersonal. Hux is pretty sure they only bonded in the first place over some cruel apathetic comment he made under his breath about a professor once, and she had snorted in amusement in her seat next to him in the lecture hall. They ended up chatting, casually, and from that went to sometimes studying together (they’re both pre-law), and then to sometimes just hanging out for no reason at all. They’ve never discussed their childhood and teen years beyond bare facts, and Hux appreciates that.

Although he supposes that, if there is anyone he’d ever tell anything to, it would be her. Maybe. He sometimes wonders if Phasma thinks that of him, too. But he doesn’t ask, and she doesn’t say. 

They study together and eat pizza in the dormitory lounge at 2 AM together, and Phasma calls him stupid nicknames and laughs at things he does and seems to enjoy his company, even though he’s never been the most enjoyable person to be around. She’s outgoing where Hux isn’t, loud and boisterous when Hux is quiet and reserved. He doesn’t really get why she enjoys his company so much, but he’s the only person she actively spends normal time with. She’s a party-goer, has acquaintances that she meets up with time to time to go to some nightclub or college party or something, but Hux never sees her with those people for any reason other than that. 

She’d invited Hux to come along a couple of times, back when they had first met, but he had politely declined and she hadn’t pushed it.

Hux doesn’t know much about friendship, but one time when he’s filling out paperwork for some job interview, it asks for an emergency contact and he writes Phasma’s name and number down on the provided blank line without any hesitation.

 

-

 

**5:06pm – New message from Christie Phasma:**  
_Hey I’m gonna be way later than I thought, work got off late among other things :((((_

Hux blinks at the message that flashes across the screen, and swipes once with his thumb to open up the message app and type a reply.

_That’s fine_

After a pause, he sends a second message.

_Would it be easier for you if we just cancelled?_

Her response is immediate.

**5:07pm – New message from Christie Phasma:**  
_Actually yes??? If that’s okay w/ you  
Sorry Huxie ;* _

She can’t see him, but he rolls his eyes anyways.

_No problem, also don’t call me that._

**5:09pm – New message from Christie Phasma:**  
_:p whatever you say huxie see you in class tmr!_

Hux smiles a little bit despite himself and puts his phone away, stretching in his chair a little before glancing around. He’s currently seated in a small coffee shop a little ways off-campus, with his laptop and a mess of papers before him. It’s an odd little place, with old squishy chairs and dim lights and a fireplace in the corner, somehow giving off the feel of a rustic cabin despite it really being a coffee shop in a well-populated city. The coffee and the espresso drinks here aren’t particularly spectacular, but they’re decent, and Hux kind of likes the place for its atmosphere over anything else. He rarely sees familiar faces, and because of its mediocre reputation, there’s never too many people in line and it’s always easy to find a place to sit and work in peace. The scones aren’t half bad, either.

Hux yawns and absentmindedly starts packing away his laptop. He’s about half-finished with an essay for class, but it’s not due in the next couple of days or so and he doesn’t really have the energy to do any more work for today. Plus he has a headache. There’s really no point in sticking around any longer if Phasma’s not going to show up, anyways. They were going to go grab some dinner together somewhere, but Hux doesn’t really mind the cancellation. He thinks he’s got some microwavable noodle dinner thing in his freezer back in his dorm, which in all honesty sounds delicious right about now.

Someone is staring at him, he realizes suddenly.

Freezing in the middle of shuffling all his notes into their proper order, his hands going still, he looks up quickly. Staring right at him is an unfamiliar man at a table nearby, who immediately starts pretending to look a different direction once Hux catches his gaze. _Odd,_ Hux thinks to himself. He’s only mildly intrigued, but he takes in the other’s appearance anyways, making an organized list of his observations in his head.

Tall. He looks too large for his chair. Jet black hair. It’s long, and sweeps in a curtain to hide most of his face. The part of his face that Hux _can_ see is frowning intently at a non-existent spot on the wall. Whatever. The man looks like he could be Hux’s age, possibly a bit older, and he’s wearing ripped black jeans and combat boots, a faded grey scarf, and some sort of angry-looking band t-shirt under his over-sized black pea-coat. The analytical part of Hux’s brain automatically calculates that if the man still has his coat on, it probably means that he hasn’t been sitting there for very long. The logical part of Hux’s brain doesn’t really care, and doesn’t really find this information useful. An even smaller, slightly irrational section of his brain finds the man mildly handsome. The reasonable part of Hux’s brain angrily stomps that thought out.

The man glances over again, realizes Hux is still watching him, and promptly huffs and looks away pointedly. It’s not very subtle. Hux sighs. This stranger that he does not know is acting like Hux’s presence in the coffee shop has somehow personally offended him, and Hux definitely doesn’t have the energy for any sort of confrontation. Decisively, Hux looks away, finishes putting all his papers into their proper folders, neatly slips them into his backpack, and stands up. 

After shrugging on his own coat and slinging his backpack over his shoulders, he allows himself to glance over at the other man again. The guy is back to staring at Hux, and now he looks like he’s positively fuming. He doesn’t avert his gaze this time. Hux narrows his eyes at him for a full second, returning the intimidating glare with one of his own, but when the man looks like he’s about to open his mouth, like he might say something, Hux turns abruptly on his heel and leaves.

The competitive part of his mind feels childishly proud of his actions, while the rational part of his mind scolds him for even bothering to stare down the man at all. His headache is worse. Hux rubs his temples and makes the walk back to his dorm determinedly not thinking about anything.

In his nineteen years of living, Hux has become reasonably good at blocking everything out, and he treats this incident in much the same way. 

 

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly guys, my own college semester starts back up next week, so I can't really guarantee any sort of timely posting schedule. No promises. But I do plan on working on this fic whenever I get the chance, so... we'll see how it goes. Until next time, then!


	2. Chapter 2

Finn thinks that, in retrospect, he probably shouldn’t have agreed to be Kylo’s roommate. But Rey and Poe had asked so _nicely_ and Finn was always one to do his best to make his friends happy, and he hadn’t had anyone else in mind, and—and he should have said no. He really should have said no.

Kylo Ren is (in words that Finn will never voice out loud) a violent, over-grown pissbaby with the temper of a six year old and the appearance of one of those disheveled punk-wannabes back in high school that had prided themselves on being outcasts. Rooming with him is a complete nightmare; Finn still retains approximately one-third of the room for his things, but Kylo’s mess of a living space takes up the rest of it. Clothes everywhere, empty food wrappers, soda cans, pillows—it’s like swimming through a sea of black and red every time Finn wants to get to his desk, since everything the other man seems to own is some shade of angry black, off-black, dark grey, and the very rare, occasional dark maroon or blood red. Kylo’s walls are plastered with dangerous looking band members and photographs of him and his grandpa, now deceased. In the far corner of the room, next to his desk that’s too cluttered to work at, stands Kylo’s prized possession, an electric bass with old twisted strings that he never plays anymore—but he still shrieks in horror if anyone even _breathes_ near it.

Rey always rolls her eyes and tells Finn he’s over exaggerating whenever he complains about Kylo, but Finn is sure he deserves a fucking reward for still being alive after a whole month of this torturous living arrangement. As it is, he can’t even study in his room without feeling vaguely claustrophobic.

“I’m doing this for you guys,” he announces over his Venti Latte and a chocolate croissant as he pulls out a chair with an angry squeak and plops down into the seat across from Poe. Rey, in the chair to his left, gives Finn a tentatively comforting pat on the arm.

“What’d he do this time?” She asks mildly, pulling a grim face—it’s a testimony to Kylo’s awful existence that she already knows Finn is referring to her cousin without even needing to ask. 

Finn groans and rubs at the spot above his left eye half-heartedly. His head is pounding, and he pretty much got no sleep last night. “I dunno, he came back late in an awful mood, but he wouldn’t talk about it. Just threw stuff around and slammed drawers for _hours_.” Rey doesn’t even bat an eyelash, just nods in sympathetic understanding. Finn recalls that she pretty much grew up with her cousin’s tantrums, having lived in the same neighborhood as him for most of her childhood.

Poe whistles low through his teeth and nods sagely at his breakfast sandwich. “I do not envy you, my man,” he says, giving Finn a smile that makes his insides feel a little queasy. “I’d be dead by now if I was in your shoes.” He looks like he might say more, but breaks off at the sight of something behind Finn. “Uh—?”

Finn looks over his shoulder and instantly shrinks back at the sight of a tall, imposing woman, standing at least six and a half feet tall and grinning down at him with heavily lidded eyes, accented by the bright, sky blue eye shadow brushed onto her lids. Finn gapes for a second, finding her unbelievably familiar.

“ _Christie_? Is that you?”

Christie Phasma’s smile grows broader in confirmation. “Heya, Finny. Long time no see, eh?”

“It is you! What are you doing here?!” Finn laughs brilliantly and jumps up to give her a hug. Phasma returns it briefly, pulling back soon to quirk a perfectly sculpted eyebrow at him, hip cocked elegantly to one side. 

“I do go to university here, you know.” She comments dryly, glancing around at Poe and Rey, who are sitting uncomfortably in their seats like they aren’t sure if they should be scared or mesmerized by this giant of a woman. Probably a little bit of both. “Who are these two little guppies?”

Finn immediately introduces them. “This is Poe, and Rey,” he says, pointing to them in turn. “Friends of mine. Guys, this is Christie, I used to work with her—we both had summer jobs as waiters at this weird little Italian place back home.” Phasma waves a manicured hand at the two of them in greeting, the bracelets on her wrist jingling happily. Finn narrows his eyes at her in mock indignation. “Why didn’t you tell me you went to school here?”

Phasma shrugs. “I didn’t have the chance, remember? I haven’t seen you since we were seventeen or something, right?” She sighs and graciously takes the remaining seat at her table. “The same could be said for you. I’m surprised I haven’t seen you around.”

“I just transferred here this semester,” Finn tells her. “I was terribly unhappy at my other school, and both Rey and Poe go here, so…” He shrugs. 

Phasma laughs. “Well, it’s nice to see you, honey. I’m meeting a friend of mine here, but do you three mind if I sit awhile ‘til he shows up?” She grins amiably at Rey and Poe, who both shake their heads with a 'No, we don’t mind at all.'

The four of them get lost in some light conversation. Phasma is just as out-going and lovely as Finn remembers, with her vaguely mysterious personality still as charming as ever. They had got along well, back in the day. Rey and Poe warm up to her instantly, letting her casually inquire facts about them. Rey’s the youngest of the three, a freshman this year, computer science major. Poe’s a sophomore like Finn, and pre-med. 

“We got Finn roped into this school because we couldn’t stand him not being here with us,” Poe says, laughing and throwing a crinkly, amused grin in Finn’s direction. “He rooms with Rey’s crazy cousin now.”

Finn groans. “Sometimes I wonder if the cost outweighs the benefit. That guy is a disaster, you wouldn’t even believe—” He’s about to go into a whirlwind of entertaining stories of Kylo for Phasma’s amusement, when a small, polite voice from behind him interrupts.

“Uhm, hi, excuse me. Phasma?” 

Finn, Rey, and Poe glance over to see an unfamiliar man with ginger hair, green eyes, and a hint of confused curiosity in his expression as he examines the trio. He’ a rather thin-looking guy, with a stiff line to his shoulders and his jaw set in a slight, uncomfortable frown. Finn decides that the guy looks like someone to stay far away from. Evidently, though, he’s the friend Phasma’s been waiting for, because she immediately looks around for an extra chair to pull up for him.

“Huxie! Hello dear, aren’t you looking charming today.” Phasma jitters adoringly at ‘Huxie,’ who immediately pulls a face at the nickname and reluctantly sits down in the chair she drags over from the neighboring table for him. 

“Don’t call me that,” he says, mostly to himself, as he shrugs off his backpack and carefully places it on the ground next to him. He folds his hands in his lap and gives a small smile that doesn’t reach his eyes in the direction of Finn, Poe, and Rey. “Brendol Hux. Nice to meet you.”

At the mention of his full name, Rey, who has been watching the newcomer with a strange expression on her face, suddenly gasps. 

“NO WAY,” she shrieks, jumping out of her seat and practically leaning across the table to look at Hux closely. “No fucking _way_ ,” she repeats, staring at him with wide eyes like he’s grown three heads. “Brendol? Do you remember me?”

Hux blinks. 

Then he goes abruptly still with recognition. “Rey?”

-

If someone had told Hux that this was how his day was going to go, he would have scoffed disbelievingly and laughed in their face. Finding Phasma sitting with his old childhood friend? Not likely. On top of all of that, he had forgotten his scarf somewhere, it was snowing heavily outside, and Phasma had asked him to meet her at _Starbucks_ , of all places. 

And now, he’s staring Rey in the face. She looks a lot different, but he can tell it’s the same little girl from the sandbox. Her eyes are just as fierce, her brown hair in three messy ponytails, which is the weirdest hairdo _ever_ but somehow it suits her perfectly.

Silently, and with a flicker of sad amusement, Hux guesses he probably doesn’t look anything like the boy she remembers. 

He reminds himself that he’s not the boy she remembers. Not really.

“This is weird,” he manages to say, smiling nervously. It probably looks like a grimace. He has no idea what to do. He’d often wondered what it would be like to run into Rey someday (especially back in middle school, when he’d still longed for the frivolities of friendship), but he’d never thought it would actually happen. Now that it’s happening, he’s kind of freaking out. He hopes it doesn’t show.

Maybe he really is that good at hiding his emotions now, because Rey doesn’t seem to sense any of his trepidation. “Oh my god, I can’t believe it’s you! How are you? Do you go to school here? Do you remember playing together—do you—” She must realize that she’s rambling insistently, because she stops herself mid-sentence and throws a kind, sheepish smile at him. “Sorry, this is just so ridiculous!”

The man who had been introduced as Finn looks really lost. “Uhm, Rey, you, ah… know this guy?” Hux can tell that the guy is vaguely disturbed by him, which shouldn’t make Hux feel smug, but it does anyways. He gets a sick sense of pride from throwing people off balance, sometimes. Phasma, on her part, is watching Hux with narrowed, intrigued eyes and a sly, knowing smile. He’s never told her about Rey before, although in his defense it’s not like Rey was some big secret. It just never came up.

“What a small world, isn’t it, Huxie,” She murmurs in dark amusement. Hux rolls his eyes at her. Rey starts excitedly blabbering more things about Hux than Hux has probably ever told anyone about himself in his entire life.

“—and he was my friend in first grade, before I moved to Kylo’s neighborhood—I know I’ve told you about him, remember?”

Poe nods in understanding. “You’ve mentioned some scrawny red-head who used to play kingdom with you or something, yeah.”

“I resent that comment,” Hux says flatly. Poe shoots him a rude grin. Hux gets the feeling that this guy doesn’t like him either. Nothing new there, of course. He shifts uncomfortably in his seat, feeling like he’s definitely had enough social contact for today. He and Phasma had been planning on heading to the library to make up for yesterday's cancelled plans, but Phasma looks like she no longer has any interest in leaving any time soon, and Hux feels mildly betrayed. 

“Well. Phasma, if you no longer want to go, I’ll just—head over by myself, and you can catch up with these guys, I suppose.” He determinedly does not look at Rey. He does not want to see the crestfallen face that is still evident in her tone of voice when she whines in protest.

“Nooooo, Brendol! Stay with us, it’s been forever! Why would you leave so soon?” 

Hux can feel a headache coming on, and he suddenly feels horribly cold and anxious. This is too much, he does not want to deal with this—he does not associate with people, except Phasma, and he realizes with a jolt of horror that he’s afraid. Of Rey. And of what her presence could potentially resurface.

So many things that he has purposely forgotten, buried deep—not as deep as he would like, but he likes to think of himself as a functioning human being and right now it’s getting really hard to breathe.

He stands up jerkily. He ignores Phasma’s eyes boring into the side of his skull, probably trying to read his mind. “I. Have work to do. An essay to write. If you’ll excuse me—” He makes the mistake of glancing up at Rey. His eyes meet hers, and he’s so jarred by the overwhelming concern in her gaze that he can feel his careful composure of many years of practice starting to crumble.

“Aw, Huxie, don’t be like that! Come on.” Hux shakes his head and looks away. He does not grace Phasma with a response, turns from the table, grabs his bag, and accidentally walks straight into someone else. 

He looks up to apologize, and then swears loudly instead. “Fucking _hell_ —”

It’s that guy from the coffee shop. Hux’s day could honestly not get any worse.

“Please, kindly, get the fuck out of my way,” he growls at the man, hating the fact that up close, the guy is just a couple inches taller. He has no patience for this. The man, with his stupid black hair and angry scowl, looks even more pissed than he had yesterday when he was burning holes into Hux’s head with his seething glares. He’s wearing the same black coat, this time with some weird, ratty maroon shirt underneath that has a vintage-looking skull on it. Big surprise there.

The other refuses to move and Hux, tired of all this shit and too proud to be the first to step down, stands his ground defiantly. The stranger’s face is no longer hidden behind his sweeping hair and Hux hates that little irrational voice inside his head that starts taking in all of the strong features of the man’s face. His sharp jawline, his prominent nose. There are constellations of moles dotting his face and neck.

 _Stop being unnecessarily poetic_ , Hux hisses at himself in his head. This showdown is stupid. This entire day is stupid. 

Despite still glaring at Hux like he’s the scum of the earth, the other guy still hasn’t said anything, and Hux unconsciously shrugs his shoulders inward and raises an eyebrow. “I’d like to leave, if you don’t mind,” he says. Shortly.

And then, of course, because the universe is most certainly out to make today a living disaster for Hux, he hears Rey pipe up from behind him. 

“Kyloooo, stop being a dramatic asshole to my friend.”

Because of course Rey knows this guy. Of-fucking-course.

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> because hey, they all have to meet up somehow. anyways hope it's all right, sorry if any of the characters are little ooc. Modern AUs are difficult that way.

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly guys, my own college semester just started up again, so I can't really guarantee any sort of timely posting schedule. No promises. But I do plan on working on this fic whenever I get the chance, so... we'll see how it goes. Until next time, then!


End file.
